Little known fact: if your conversation with an interest goes THIS way, you'll score a date, no doubt.
You: Hello, I think you're pretty handsome and nice, want to go out sometime?
Interest: Umm... probably not.
You: Are you sure ((insert full name here))?
Interest: Hooooooow do you know my full name?
You: Well, (insert first name only, this time) it simply goes along with the social security number ((insert their ssn)) So what do you say Mr.(insert astrological sign here), want to go on a date? I can be at ((insert address of interest here)) by 7pm tonight, thats when you get home from ((insert occupation)), right?
Interest: Well, uh... yeah I'll be home but...
You: Great! I'll see you then. Or else.
So I've recently stalked a man into hanging out with me. And this fella could be one of the most 'people-person' people who ever existed. Tonight, thanks to those people skills, I was able to meet Nancy, the 72yr old Go-Go Dancin' Jesus Lovin' Gift Shop lady.
Nancy was a fireball. I love that a 72yr old woman could make me feel slightly uncomfortable because i didn't know what crazy things she would do or say next. She could Jitterbug, for sure. She was also pretty quick to give marriage advice. It was basically things I had heard before, but this woman broke my heart. Nancy has been married for 42 years. She says communication is very important, and if you can't talk to your man/lady about everything, it's no good. She, however, cannot talk to her husband about everything. They just don't communicate, she says.
She also says it means everything when a husband and wife both desire to grow and be a servant of Christ. She didn't use the word "servant" though... ugh i can't remember what exactly she said... I was probably too busy thinking, "well this conversation is only a bit awkward for a fourth date..."
Nancy loves the Lord. Her husband does not.
While she was talking about her husband, how boring he is but how good of a man he is... I didn't catch her saying she loved him. I was looking for it because it just seemed like the thing people say all the time: "well, they aren't perfect, but i love them..." I'm not saying she doesn't love her husband. It just broke my heart listening to this woman who was so alive and animate talk about something she knows she won't have. I can't know what goes on at home, she may not even try to make the marriage better... who knows! But to be so alive, and then to go home and probably go to sleep next to the same person she's been going to sleep next to for decades... not getting to be so alive anymore.. It's just sad. It's probably true in so many marriages.
How does that happen? Is it because people marry the wrong people? Or does happiness just fade out sometimes? Clearly happiness can't exist where there is constant disappointment, but then what are you supposed to do with the disappointment... if it's for better or for worse? Who wrote those vows, anyway?
Ug I'm starting to not think straight. Sleep intermission...
...And awake.
So yeah, Nancy made me cry a wee bit, and I really want to talk to her more. She seems to have a very full life, playing with grand kids and great grand kids... but maybe I could stalk HER into going on a date with me... yes... I think I shall. *wink wink*
***disclosure*** I'm not an advocate for divorce... I realize my "who wrote those vows" comment could make it seem otherwise. I just... I wonder where the line gets drawn. I could probably write a gazillion more words about that. But I don't want to right now. I want to brush my teeth and go make lattes.
***disclosure*** this homework assignment was late.
This post is intriguing to me, to say the least. I always try to view relationships from Christ's perspective. It doesn't always apply just right, but I find that it brings the best perspective for me. Love is not a thing so hard to find, I think. Jesus loves everyone and we are called to attempt the same.
ReplyDeleteCommunication works both ways, and everyone has different ways of communicating. There's no set 'rules' for communication except the rules that are set by God. And God's rules are pretty simple, really. He just asks us to be honest.
My grandparents love each other deeply. My grandma is a chatterbox and my grandpa barely speaks at all, but it works. In fact, it works so well, that I don't know if I've ever seen a couple who work better than they do.
The thing is, my grandma doesn't need verbal affirmation to understand him or to feel loved by him. She finds those things in his actions and decisions. With that being said, I don't see why Nancy can't just love her husband for 'being a good man'?